Our daughter Sonali Robyne Bryant was born on May 26, 2016. Her name means ‘golden’ in Hindi. Robyne is my mother’s name. I’m now a father. As I wrote about here, Sasmita and I decided not to learn our baby’s gender before birth, we both wanted the surprise. The doctors and attending nurses assumed we… Continue reading Do you want to see the world? – Thoughts on Fatherhood
Since Narendra Modi became India’s Prime Minister in May 2015, the definition of a ‘true’ Indian is a hot topic. However, for me, people have always questioned my India bona-fides. Let me explain. As an adoptee, raised without Indian culture on a daily basis, cultural Indians in the United States were always unsure how I fit into… Continue reading Who is a ‘Real’ Indian?
Sasmita and I decided against learning the sex of our coming baby. We do not want to cloud the joyous event, by placing expectations or hopes of a specific gender. But there’s another reason; Sasmita is uncomfortable discovering a baby’s sex because in India it’s illegal. Prenatal sex determination testing is against Indian law. Indian society… Continue reading We don’t know if we’re having a boy or girl. In India it’s illegal to find out.
Sasmita and I watched the funny and sweet documentary, ‘Meet the Patels.’ But I did have one major issue with the film. It’s mockery of India’s complexion biases. It’s a heart-warming tale about a 30-year-old Indian guy. His name is Ravi Patel and his quest (really his parents wish, but he acquiesces) to find an… Continue reading ‘Meet the Patels’ Dismissed India’s Complexion Shaming. That’s Unfortunate.
Recently, Sasmita and I were eating dinner. About halfway through, her eyes got big, and she excitedly told me that she saw ‘a big creature’ today, in the yard by the mailbox. Intrigued, as always, by such pronouncements, I told her to continue. She told me that it stood as tall high as my knee, with a… Continue reading ‘A.J – I Saw a Creature Today’
Earlier this summer I read a fascinating article titled ‘Death, Redesigned.” As I read the piece, it struck me how vastly different the West views death and how Sasmita and Indians view death. The story begins with Paul Bennett, the founder of Ideo, a design, marketing, and branding firm in San Francisco Bay. It’s famous for among other things,… Continue reading I say ‘dies,’ Sasmita says ‘expires.’ The words signal a major cultural difference.
Recently, Sasmita and I went to an Indian restaurant called Woodlands, in Langley Park, Maryland. We rarely eat Indian food outside of our house. Sasmita is a fantastic cook, and she makes most dishes either of us might order out, usually they taste better than any restaurant. She has craved South Indian cuisine for a while;… Continue reading Feeling like an Outsider at an Indian Buffet
Sasmita and I celebrated our third Christmas holiday season together in 2014. But it was the first Christmas that I actually know my Indian side of our family, the Nayaks. As I wrote about here, Sasmita and I visited them in June 2014. We had an Indian wedding ceremony and stayed in her village, Alligonda at her parent’s house for a… Continue reading The First Christmas Knowing my Indian family
For those unaware, this is National Adoption Awareness Month. There has been a lot of social media about this, some good pieces in well-known magazines, like the NY Times and elsewhere. National Adoption Month, was created to raise awareness and celebrate foster care adoption. In recent years it has been co-opted by the Adoption lobby and by those… Continue reading A Small Thank You to my Parents this Thanksgiving 2014
I began this blog more than four years ago, to write mainly about my experience and thoughts regarding international adoption. As time progressed, I became more passionate about my roots, and that means writing and thinking increasingly about India, and her issues. Add to this fact that I married an Indian national and that my… Continue reading Seeking Balance When Writing about India
My ‘fairy tale’ story, through a podcast, in three 10 minute segments from the Land of Gazillion Adoptees blog.
As some of you know, I married the love of my life Sasmita in August of 2012. After a courtship conducted primarily over Skype for over a year….But this post is not about her background, but rather what it’s like to be married to someone who had never left India and came to the US for the first time in mid-July 2012.
Having a western name, but being brown skinned and the confusion that arises because of it.